From Here: What is…
To There: “What if?”
Perspective
For many people with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD), life is shaped by a two-act system that seems almost prewritten. Act One runs from birth to age 22, school years filled with Individualized Education Programs, therapy schedules, and structured services. Then, almost overnight, Act Two begins and stretches the rest of their life: a group home, a day program, and a steady rhythm that rarely changes.
This is not everyone’s story, but it’s the default “what is” story for far too many. The problem isn’t that group homes or day programs are inherently bad, they can be supportive, safe, and important. The problem is that they’re often treated as THE option instead of one of many possible options. That’s where “What if?” comes in.
What if… someone wants a job instead of a day program?
What if… the person wants to start a business?
What if… they could rent their own apartment, choose their roommates, or decorate their home however they want?
What if… they celebrated milestones just like anyone else (turning 18 and registering to vote, turning 21 and ordering a drink)
What if… the person wants an actual boyfriend/girlfriend?
What if… AI can be used as a partner or tool?
What if…. Restraints can be avoided in almost every scenario?
What if agency leadership, practices saying What if?
What if… the arc of a person’s life wasn’t DICTATED by a service system, but by their own dreams, values, and choices?
The “what is” mindset measures success by fitting people into the existing system. The “what if” mindset challenges us to expand the system, or step outside of it, so life possibilities aren’t artificially capped and restricted
Skills and Habits
- Ask the Question: Practice saying “What if?” during planning meetings, reviews, and daily conversations. Then go further and notice what happens after you ask it. Too often, barriers appear quickly: funding limits, staffing shortages, transportation issues, “that’s not how we do it” policies, and possibly the most damaging judgment, the person is “not competent enough” or “not independent enough.” These become invisible ceilings and boundaries that may not be fair or necessary. Your challenge is to name those barriers out loud and then reframe them, not as reasons to stop, but as obstacles to overcome. Ask, “If this barrier didn’t exist, how would we make it happen?” and then start working toward that version of the future.
Barrier Reframe Examples:
Barrier: “We don’t have staff to support that schedule.”
Reframe: “What if we flex staff schedules or involve community volunteers?”
Barrier: “They can’t afford their own place.”
Reframe: “What if we look at housing vouchers, shared housing, or co-ops?”
Barrier: “Transportation is a problem.”
Reframe: “What if we explore ride-share, mobility training, or job sites on bus lines?”
Barrier: “We’ve never done that before.”
Reframe: “What if we pilot it for one person and see what works?”
Barrier: “They’re not competent or independent enough.”
Reframe: “What if we provide the right supports, training, or assistive technology so they can do it successfully?”
- Expand the Menu: Present multiple life options, not just the standard paths.
- Use Real-Life Benchmarks: Include common milestones in goal planning, just as you would for someone without a disability.
- Seek Natural Supports: Leverage community resources, friends, and informal networks alongside formal services.
Motivation
When we replace “what is” with “what if,” we open the door to a fuller, richer set of possibilities. This is more than inclusion, it’s equity in the right to dream and pursue a life that feels worth living. Every “what if” asked is a doorway to choice, autonomy, and the milestones that make life feel like life.
Leadership
Leaders set the tone for what’s possible. If your organization defaults to the two-act system, challenge it.
- Revise Policies: Remove internal rules that limit housing, employment, or relationship choices.
- Fund Innovation: Support pilot programs that try non-traditional living, working, or learning arrangements.
- Model Curiosity: Encourage staff at every level to ask “what if” and reward creative problem-solving.
When leadership says “what if” out loud, it gives permission for everyone else to do the same.
The One Thing
Regardless of where you are on this journey from here to there, from “what is” to “what if?” may we all say to ourselves on a daily basis…
“Today I choose, in my role, to assist people in getting their needs met.”
