From Here: What if it goes wrong?
To There: What if it goes right?!
Perspective
We’ve all seen it, someone brings up a new opportunity for a person with IDD, and within seconds, the room fills with “what if it goes wrong?” energy. The job, the trip, the class, the relationship, every possibility gets run through a mental catastrophe generator. People start forecasting disasters before anyone’s even taken the first step.
But here’s what’s often hiding beneath that fear: a deep sense of how vulnerable we think the person is.
And here’s the shift: vulnerability isn’t a personal trait, it’s a contextual condition. It’s not who the person is, it’s where and how they’re being supported. People become vulnerable in environments that are inaccessible, unpredictable, overstimulating, unsupported, or just plain rigid. But the good news? That means we can change it.
“What if it goes right?!” is more than just a hopeful phrase, it’s a mindset and method. It’s the idea that our first question shouldn’t be “what if this breaks?” but “what would it take to make this possible?”
Let’s flip the script:
- From catastrophizing risks to engineering for opportunity
- From defining people by vulnerability to redefining environments for access
- From seeing “no” as protection to designing safe-enough-to-try systems
- From support that avoids risk to support that creates freedom
Skills and Habits
The shift begins by doing three simple things. Not easy, but simple.
Step 1: Ask “What if it goes right?!”
Start every planning conversation from possibility. Literally. Ask:
“What if this worked out? What would we see next week? What would success feel like to you?”
Let the person define the outcome in plain, human language—not jargon. And then find one small step you can take within the next two weeks to move in that direction. Something that can be tested, not theorized. Tiny steps build trust and momentum.
Step 2: Make the obstacle list (honestly)
Once you’ve named what “going right” looks like, write down what’s standing in the way. Be real.
For each obstacle, ask:
- Is this a barrier in the environment?
- A skill that needs building?
- A resource that’s missing?
Then sort obstacles into:
- Must-address for safety
- Nice-to-address for comfort
- Can-wait for later
This keeps you from spiraling into the “we can’t do anything until we fix everything” trap.
Step 3: Pick one obstacle and solve it with the person
Don’t try to fix everything. Choose one meaningful, addressable obstacle ideally an environmental one because those are the easiest to change and have the biggest payoff. Work with the person to co-design a small test.
Decide who’s doing what, when it’s happening, and what your Plan B is if it doesn’t go as planned. (“If the ride doesn’t show up, then we call X and shift to backup.”) Then run the test. Debrief. Adjust. Run it again.
Celebrate progress, not perfection. First drafts are practice. Confidence is earned through doing.
Motivation
This approach isn’t about ignoring risk—it’s about designing support that creates possibility. Every success, even a tiny one, chips away at fear. With each experiment, you gain real data. You build belief. You build skill. You build a future.
The more we treat vulnerability as a design challenge, not a personal limitation, the more we create systems where anyone can thrive.
Cognitive Distortions That Derail Progress
Most of the barriers to change don’t come from the person with IDD, they come from the people around them imagining disaster. Here are four common thinking traps, and how to flip them:
Catastrophizing
Definition: Expecting the worst possible outcome, regardless of how likely it is.
Example: “If she goes to that class, she’ll have a meltdown, run out, and we’ll all be liable.”
Reframe: What’s the actual hazard? How can the environment be adjusted to reduce risk? Quieter room, familiar staff, exit cue, trial run? Make it safe-enough-to-try, not fail-proof.
Overgeneralizing
Definition: Believing one bad experience means failure is inevitable.
Example: “He tried that once and didn’t like it. He can’t handle the “community.”
Reframe: What specific condition made it hard last time? Was it too loud? Too long? Too crowded? Adjust the setting, scale it down, and try again. Don’t let one bad Tuesday ruin all future Fridays.
Mind Reading
Definition: Assuming we know what someone will think, feel, or want without asking.
Example: “She’ll be too anxious. She won’t want to go.”
Reframe: Ask. Let her try. Set up signals and safety nets. Let real feedback guide support, not fear-based fiction.
All-or-Nothing Thinking
Definition: Believing success only counts if it’s fully independent, with no support.
Example: “If he can’t ride the bus alone, he can’t take public transit at all.”
Reframe: There’s a staircase between total dependence and full independence. Travel training, buddy rides, GPS tracking, check-ins, these are the supports that promote freedom.
Try-It Scenarios
Community Job Trial
What if you worked a two-hour shift at the coffee cart because you love chatting with people?
Obstacle: rush-hour buses, noise, coach availability.
Fix: try an off-peak shift, practice the route with a buddy, set a backup ride plan. Test. Debrief. Repeat.
Independent Evenings
What if Tuesday nights were yours, music, friends, or a class?
Obstacle: medication schedule, staff overlap.
Fix: shift meds by 30 minutes (nurse-approved), adjust staff timing, and try one low-sensory activity.
Ordering at a Restaurant
What if you ordered your own meal this weekend?
Obstacle: communication device anxiety, loud restaurant.
Fix: program a few phrases, choose a quieter table. Celebrate the order—and the confidence boost.
Leadership
Leaders can either reinforce fear or unleash potential. Here’s how to lead toward “What if it goes right?!”
- Policy: Create guidelines that prioritize safe-enough-to-try planning, not perfection or permission.
- Training: Teach teams to recognize cognitive distortions and design environmental supports.
- Supervision: Ask “What went right?” first in every review. Make success visible, not just safety.
- Resources: Fund small pilots. $100 for a test run is better than $0 for a missed opportunity.
- Family Engagement: Host “What-If Workshops” to shift mindsets, design supports, and build courage together.
The One Thing
Regardless of where you are on this journey from here to there, from “What if it all goes wrong” to “What if it all goes right!?… may we all say to ourselves on a daily basis… “Today I choose, in my role, to assist people in getting their needs met.”
